Grace in Utah

Chick-Fil-A, Softball, and the Hospital

2006-07-29T00:05:00.000-05:00

I was originally going to title this post: "Chick-Fil-A, Softball, and the Emergency Room" except for the fact that instead of going home, I am now in my second full day of being at the hospital. For those of you who do not know, I passed out during our team's championship softball game the other night because I have blood clots in my lungs. I honestly thought the 15 chicken nuggets that I ate before the game had something to do with it, but I was a little off with this scientific explanation. We ended up losing the game, and I ended up in the hospital for at least 5-6 days until my blood reacts to the blood thinners that I am on. (Excuse me for a sec, while I get my vitals checked, again-I have been poked and prodded more times in the last two days than in my entire life combined.) No one is really sure what caused the blood clots so I have had a ton of tests done. All the tests that have come back so far have not shed any light on the subject.
So far the biggest problem that I have run into is absolute boredom. I am absolutely stir crazy. I have, however, been able to watch baseball and Sportscenter so not everything is horrible. I also have an unlimited supply of chocolate ice-cream. So even though I am in the hospital, there are still some perks.
I don't know if I use humor to hide what I'm really feeling or not, but here are some more serious thoughts: I could have died if one of my friends, who is a nurse, had not been in the emergency room with me. The doctor there was only checking my heart, but she noticed my oxygen levels were low, so he monitered this and eventually gave me a lung scan which is where they noticed the clots.
I am humbled and encouraged by the countless emails and phone calls that I have gotten from folks who are praying for me and my family. It was great to see names of old friends (Drew & Scott N.) who are praying for all of this.
I still want to be able to minister to the hospital staff, but I do not feel spiritual, nor do I have anything to offer. Please pray they will see Jesus in me even while cooped up in the hospital. Pray as well that this will be a good lesson for me when I get out of the hospital: to minister out of having nothing to offer, and allow the Spirit of God work in and through me to reach the lives of other people.
There is not much left to say. I get worn out pretty easily, so I'm heading to bed. Thank you again for praying for us and loving us in so many ways.

Just a Great Day

2006-07-23T23:37:00.000-05:00

Today was one of those days that when you get to the end of it you can lie in bed and say to your lovely wife, "What an incredible day." Our service was great this morning. We mixed things up a bit and added a corporate confession of sin with a declaration of forgiveness afterward. I have greatly missed this since leaving St. Louis, and it was great to confess our sin together, and then be told that we are forgiven in Christ. I was actually the one who got to do this, and I loved it. We also had a full room this morning, and there were several of our regulars out of town. We had two families who visited this week, and hopefully I'm going fishing with one of the guys this Saturday. Inch by inch God is growing our little church, and it is a great thing to be a part of. I also got to preach this morning, and I loved it. I really do enjoy preaching. I love being able to stand up in front of people and tell them what the Bible says. It is humbling and exciting all at the same time. After church we came home, ate leftovers, and we all took a three hour nap. I love Sunday afternoon naps. I cannot function without them. After our nap we headed up to the mountains where it was almost 30 degrees cooler. It was over 100 degrees in the valley this entire weekend. It was great hike. Joshua and Emma love being outdoors, and it is so much fun to watch them enjoy the beauty of God's creation. I absolutely love living in Utah! After the hike, we picked up dinner from Taco Bell. Talk about a great way to end a great day. We ate dinner as a family at 9:30 at night, and we all had a blast. It was just a great day.

Things on the Horizon

2006-06-26T10:38:00.000-05:00

Sorry I have not been very faithful in keeping folks updated. Things have been crazy here, and I am still trying to have some sort of structure, and something similar to a routine. Things are still up and down here-times of loving life and praising God for bringing us to Utah; times of wondering what in the world we are doing here. Honestly, I think this is a combination of life in Utah and my personality-high highs and low lows. Here are a few things to keep you updated on: I got to preach three weeks in a row and I really did enjoy it. I know this a way over-used quote, but to borrow from Eric Liddell, "When I preach, I feel God's pleasure."
Tim Barton went on vacation and General Assembly for a couple of weeks, and I got to "run the show." It was both exciting and a learning experience. I'm not quite sure I'm ready to be a solo pastor yet. I still have a lot of learning and growing up to do. But that's okay-I'm going to be in ministry and probably Utah for the long haul. I am excited about what God is doing in me, my family, and our church. I recently wrote about a cross-dresser. He has now come to Jordan Pres. for four weeks in a row, and I am so proud of the congregation. They have done an incredible job of reaching out to him. Continue to pray for us as we seek to love him and minister to him without "playing the game."
Our family got our first dog. Joshua named him Copper from The Fox and the Hound. He loves that movie. He is two months old, so we are all learning what it means to take care of a puppy. He is going to be a great dog one day (half lab, half retriever), but for now he is a pain in the butt puppy.
Steph and I finally got bikes. I rode to the coffee shop this morning in 9am traffic. It was fun, but I am so out of shape.
I meet with the Candidates and Credentials Committee of the North California Presbytery again in September. Please pray for this. I really need to bust it studying over the next couple of months. Please pray for diligence and discipline. I would ask you to pray that I would not feel the need to impress, but that feeling will come. Pray, like a wise friend once said, that even when I have that feeling, I would not act on it.
One last thing, if you are reading this blog and do not get prayer updates, please leave a comment, and I will add you to our list of faithful friends and churches who are praying for us.

Cross-Dressing and the Gospel

2006-06-05T23:38:00.000-05:00

I had probably the most unusual experience to ever happen to me just this past Sunday. A cross-dresser named Kimberly came to our church. To be honest, no one really knew what to do, except my wife Stephanie. Steph went right up to "her" after the service and welcomed her to Jordan Pres. I would have never met her if I had not seen Steph already talking. It was the most uncomfortable conversation of my life. It took me several moments to get over the initial shock. I had no idea what to say. Beside the fact that he was a cross-dresser, it was very difficult to carry on a conversation. How do you make small-talk with the "elephant in the room?" When I finally got over the initial shock, I finally started thinking about how the gospel would impact someone like him. It was one of those times when I was dying to know what Jesus would have said to her (please no WWJS jokes) and really engage her heart. The questions keep coming: how can our church minister to him? Is this a way to really find out how friendly and welcoming our church really is? Is our church, or any church for that matter, a safe place for perverts? (please know that I don't mean safe in the sense they can do anything they want) Should'nt we want a church full of them? What I long for is that the bride of Christ would be a place where everyone is humbly aware of their need of grace-to the point that when a cross-dresser, ex-con, homosexual, etc. comes into our churches we do not look on them with disgust and contempt, but that we look on them as fellow image bearers who the Son of God shed his blood for. Are these folks beyond the grace of God? You were not. I was not. Do we not worship the God who changes hearts and souls and minds, and loves doing it? Please continue to pray for us as we seek to engage and serve our culture for God's glory and the advancement of his Kingdom.

Three Hours Later

2006-05-06T23:30:00.000-05:00

In my last prayer update, I asked folks to pray that we could find creative ways to serve our neighbors. God has been faithful to answer that prayer, but of course, it came in an unexpected way. One couple asked us to watch their dogs (their "babies") for them while they drive to Dayton, Ohio. We told them we would love to, but we were not aware that they meant this weekend. The wife came over to the house yesterday morning just minutes after I had dropped Stephanie off at the airport. She asked me if I would still be able to take care of her dogs for the weekend. I was alone with the kids for first time for more than an afternoon, but I did not want to pass up on the opportunity to serve in this way. After giving me all the instructions, she told me that she did not trust one of her dogs around children. I, of course, blew her off.

Joshua was bit by the dog she warned me about. I turned my head for three seconds, and Joshua went to pet the dog while she was eating. She bit him in the elbow and the hand. It drew blood, but it was not deep. It scared both of us. I felt terrible. I took Joshua to McDonald's for breakfast, and he was fine.

I went back over to the house this evening to feed them again, and the dog that bit Joshua was nowhere to be found. She had dug a hole under the fence. I found out later that she had never been left outside for that long before. I called the neighbors and they were, to use their own words, "freakin' out" and all they wanted me to do was bring their baby home.

To be honest, I did not care about the dog, but I did care about the neighbors, and God did as well. Joshua and I prayed that we could find the dog and get her home safe. With the help of incredible friends we got her home, three hours later.

A Little Bit at a Time

2006-05-03T22:22:00.000-05:00

I've been in Utah for a month and a day now, and I'm really at a loss for words. It has been a little bit of everything: excitement, fear, adventure, doubt, feeling at home, longing for St. Louis, etc. What I was told pretty often before I came is that ministry out here is slow going. It take a while for a Mormon to come to Christ, and Christian churches are not busting at the seams out here. What we are committed to at Jordan Pres. is not to "stir the evangelical pot," but to see people come to Christ. I have never been anywhere where a lot of people come to Christ, but I am convinced that this is the only way for Christ-centered churces to to grow out here. Thus it is slow going. It just takes a while for a person to come to faith, and then to grow. But it is happening. People's lives are being changed; it just takes time. Please pray for this. It is only the Spirit of God that can change people's lives. Please pray that he will continue to do this in Jordan, Utah.

From 8th Grade With Love

2006-04-21T00:22:00.000-05:00

I played my first softball game in more than six months and it was horrific. First of all I was late. Second of all I took a shot off my shin from the second batter that we pitched to, and third and I struck out looking my first at-bat. Looking I said! Do you know how hard it is to strike out looking in softball? My bat never came off my shoulders. Talk about your first impressions with people that I had never met before. I'm sure they were glad that I was added to their roster! There are two good things about the entire night. First, we won. Second, I just happened to grab a jersey with the number 3 on it. Dale Murphy wore #3 and happens to be my baseball hero. He is, of course, a Mormon. Go figure.

Enjoy the pic. This is when I was in 8th grade and cooool!

I'm Home

2006-04-02T22:57:00.000-05:00

We pulled in at 6 pm MST, and it was so good to see the house. It was right at 2100 miles from my dad's driveway in South Carolina to my driveway in West Jordan. We are thankful to the Lord for getting us here safely. We are both completely exhausted. I am looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow morning. Good night.

Still Goin' West

2006-04-01T20:50:00.001-05:00

We made it all the way to North Platte, Nebraska today so we are right at 2/3 of the way there. We should pull into Jordan sometime tomorrow night. There really isn't much else to say. We saw a lot of corn fields, thus the picture. Other than this, nothing too exciting.

Go West Young Man

2006-03-31T21:47:00.000-05:00

We started our trek today for the Great West, and made as far as St. Louis. My dad and I made it 750 miles before calling it a day. We still have a good ways to go, but if we eat more Bojangle's Biscuits and Double Cheeseburgers from McDonald's we should be fine (I'm starting a diet as soon as I get to Utah!) It has been a great first day, but I am ready to be in my own house and my own bed. Only four more nights before this happens. I cannot wait.
Tomorrow I hope we can make it across Missouri and most of Nebraska if not all of it before we stop again. I'm going to bed. Good night!

No Longer a Friend of Narnia

2006-03-20T20:35:00.000-05:00

I am only a few pages away from finishing up The Chronicles of Narnia, and I am a bit puzzled about The Last Battle. For one thing Aslan does not even show up until page 183. In all of the other books he shows up very early on and plays a vital role in all of the adventures. As a matter of fact, he is directing the adventures. But in the last adventure he is noticeably absent, and in the mean time several characters stop believing in him. Queen Susan is not with her brothers and sister when they show up at the end. When asked of her whereabouts, Peter responds "shortly and gravely, 'Susan is no longer a friend of Narnia.'"

I got an email from a friend in Nashville who has a friend in seminary who is starting to move in the direction of no longer being a Christian. I have another friend whose younger brother has renounced the faith and does not want anything to do with Jesus. There is yet another friend whose brother-in-law, a pastor's son, wants nothing to do with Jesus either. The tears and the questions are many.

I do not have any answers. Yes I am a Calvinist, but it is awfully difficult when my theology, even good theology, does not match up with my experience and the experience of others. I do not understand when Jesus does not show up until page 183. I want him to show up when I want him to show up. I want him to do things my way and on my timetable. My friend from Nashville feels like Martha who wondered why Jesus could not have shown up two days earlier and stopped Lazarus from dying. I do know that Jesus wept for Lazrus. He wept over the death and the destruction of the Fall. I want my heart to weep with him and over those who are turning away.

At the same time I want a heart that rejoices over the fact that he continues to give me more and more reasons to believe Jesus is who he says he is. If he is not, then we are all just wasting our time.

God's View of the Mormon

2006-03-17T14:51:00.000-05:00

I recently spoke at a Wednesday night fellowship group on the basic beliefs of Mormons. As I spoke I noticed some disgusted looks in the crowd ( I don't think they were directed at me, though they could have been). They were looks like: "How can they believe that!" "That is nothing short of blasphemy!" Granted, I will be the first to admit that some of the things that Mormons believe are off and indeed blasphemous (the idea that God was once a man), but we as Christians need to find another response to them other than blowing them off as irrevelant, or getting so angry with them that when we go to Temple Square in Salt Lake City we hold up signs that say, "God Hates Mormons!" There has to be third way. Does God really hate Mormons? Did he hate you or I before he brought us to himself?

At the very least Mormons are image bearers just as you and I are. David wrote that human beings are crowned with glory and honor. Yes, the Fall has distorted these things, but not destroyed them. When we interact with Mormons, or any unbeliever for that matter, we must interact with them in a way that affirms their dignity as fellow image bearers. One of the ideas that has been a challenge to me is that God did not send Jesus into the world for good people who loved him. He sent him to die for people who hated him; for his enemies, for the ungodly. Could he not show the same patience and compassion to Mormons as he showed to you and I? Remember Jesus- when he saw the crowds he had compassion on them because they were helpless and harassed like sheep without a shepherd.

The orthodox church cannot afford to blow off Mormons any longer. It is the second fastest growing religion only behind Islam. We must learn to dialogue with them in such a way that they will listen to what we have to say. The second we attack we have broken off all lines of communication. So the next time two 19 year old missionaries show up at your front door, don't slam the door in their face, but invite them in. Offer them some water or lemonade and hear them out. Engage their heart: ask them their fears, their hopes, their dreams, etc. In other words, treat them like a human being.

Suffering and the Church and the Mormon

2006-02-24T22:28:00.000-05:00

So what does all my ramblings below have to do with the Mormon church? It is this: there is no room for suffering for the Mormon. There is such pressure to perform that there is nowhere they can go to be open and honest about where they are. For example, a Mormon is not even supposed to drink coffee. What in the world are they going to do if they are struggling with a specific sin? Who can they talk to? And if they do talk to someone what they are going to hear is this: "You can do better. Just keep trying and you will be fine." Where is the Gospel?
One of mine and Steph's desires is that we can create an environment of safety for those we get to know. I think it will begin with the two us. We are both committed to living a life of brokenness before those who will be watching. We are both learning there is great freedom in being honest about our weaknesses and suffering. It is here that Jesus has met us and continues to meet us. So it is our hope and prayer that those whom the Lord puts in our lives will be drawn to a Jesus who loves and heals and changes instead of a false religion that tells you simply to just do better.

Suffering and the Church

2006-02-24T22:08:00.000-05:00

One of my passions is to see the church become a safe place. What I mean is that it becomes a place where people can be honest about their suffering and not show up in their "Sunday best." No one should have to suffer alone, but we live in a time and culture that almost dehumanizes suffering; as though there is something wrong with someone if they are suffering. I think most of this stems from the fear that we do not know what to do with someone who is really struggling with something. We live in two extremes: either we try to "fix" the person or we try to blow it off and tell them that "everything is going to be okay." Neither of which are helpful, and even sometimes harmful. There is nothing wrong with just being there and not having anything to say. The best thing Job's friends did was just sit there. It was when they started talking that everything goes to pot.
The church will become a safe place when people learn to enter into someone's pain instead of trying to fix it or blow it off. What would this look like? Tears, moaning, sighing, late nights, etc. We cannot leave our brothers and sister to deal with things on their own. Peterson has great insights into this: "When private grief is integrated into communal lament, several things take place. For one thing the act of suffering develops significance. If others weep with me, there must be more to the suffering than my own petty weakness or selfish sense of loss. When others join the sufferer, there is 'consensual validation' that the suffering means something. The community votes with its tears that there is suffering that is worth weeping over. Further, community participation insures a human environment. The threat of dehumanization to which all pain exposes us-of being reduced to the level of 'the beasts that perish'-is countered by the presence of other persons whose humanity is unmistakable. The person who, through stubbornness or piety, insists on grieving privately not only depersonalizes himself or herself but robs the community of participation in what necessarily expands its distinctiveness as a human community as over against the mob."

3040 Meadow Green Way

2006-02-19T19:55:00.000-05:00

The House

2006-02-18T17:35:00.000-05:00

We found a house that is perfect for our family. (hopefully we can put a picture up later) It has a huge backyard for our non-stop children. Not only is it a big backyard, but it backs up to some horse property. Which, of course, is perfect for Joshua! It has a huge deck for grilling, smoking, praying, etc! It is 2100 square feet with three bedrooms and three baths. We were really hoping for four bedrooms, but we could not find any in our price range, but the basement is fully finished and big enough to add a bedroom when we need to. It has a great view of the mountains. It will be great to eat breakfast and watch the sun rise over the Wasatch Mountains. It has a great wide-open feel with vaulted ceilings with an overlook from the second floor. It has a fireplace in the living room and a wood burning stove in the family room downstairs. Everything in the house is brand new, even though the house itself was built in 1983. The owner before us put in new floors, carpet, and appliances. All the rooms have been painted recently with great colors. Basically all we have to do is move in. I'm still planning on leaving April 1st with Steph, the kids, and my mother-in-law getting on a plane a few days later. That is only six weeks from now. I cannot wait.

House Huntin' Part 2

2006-02-18T17:20:00.000-05:00

Steph and I have a few minutes before we get on our final flight back to Charlotte to give everyone a quick update. (Sorry there are no other parts to this; the computer I used in Utah only had dial-up and blogging took forever.) We started Thursday morning bright and early meeting with the Realtor,(our Realtor was amazing!-he was 68 years old, but looked like he was 50. He has a PhD. In economics from UCLA and was an appointee of the first President Bush for some sort of import/Export Bank. He and his wife moved to Salt Lake to help one of their daughters and her husband with a physically handicapped son. We were in great hands. They took such good care of us even though they usually sell million dollar homes, and we weren't quite in that price range.) Anyway, we did all the paper-work for the Realtor and then we spent an hour and a half with the mortgage lady. This was not nearly as painful as I was expecting. It really wasn't that bad, and we were pre-approved for above our price range. Finally, after lunch, we went house huntin'. The first two houses were not good. Too small, too old, etc. The third house we looked at we both loved (more about the house in the next blog). The fourth house was okay, but our minds went back to the third house.
The next morning we went and looked at four more houses just to compare to the house we both loved. We were told that morning that there were at least two other interested buyers, and so we needed to move fast. We went back to the house for a final time and decided to make an offer. The buyer countered only once, and we took it and beat out three other offers. We are so excited about this house, and we hope that we can have many visitors come out and see us.

House Huntin' Part I

2006-02-15T23:17:00.000-05:00

Steph and I arrived in Jordan, Utah just a couple of hours ago to begin our search for a home. We meet with our realtor in the morning to begin looking at the 10 or 11 houses that she has lined up for us. We are both very excited about finding a house that we will love. When we talked to Joshua earlier today he wanted to know what our new house looked like. He is just as excited as the two of us. I hope to give an update every evening to let folks know things are going.

Idolatry of Self

2006-02-12T23:51:00.000-05:00

Where Ritualism does not reign, how easy it is for men to be idolaters of
themselves! What is self-reliance, understood as too many understand it,
but idolatry of self? It is the opposite of dependence upon the living God,
the great source of power and wisdom. Reliance upon, my own wisdom, upon
my own resolution, upon my own strength of mind, — these are idolatries
in a subtle and attractive shape. What, is much of our overweening
affection to our children and to our relatives? What, is our unsubmissive
repining but idolatry? How is it that we rebel against God if our friends are
suddenly taken from us? O man, why is it, that, thy God has so little of thy love, and the creature so much?
-C.H. Spurgeon

Leavin' San Francisco

2006-02-08T22:22:00.000-05:00

I’m just a few minutes away from leaving the great state of California. I’m leaving pretty discouraged as I did not pass my oral exam. As soon as it was over (3 hours from when it began) I knew that I did not do well. To be honest, I would not have passed myself. I just did not articulate things well, and there were some things I just flat out did not know. A lot of it, I think, had to do with expectations. To use a baseball analogy, I was expecting a fast ball right down the middle, and I got a slider down and away. I really do not know how I could have prepared differently. I studied well, and I prepared as best as I could. Without downplaying my disappointment, I really am okay. This does not change anything as far as Utah goes except for the timing of my ordination. It will be at least six months before I meet with the committee again, and then I will have to go to Hawaii to go before Presbytery sometime in October. It will be tough, but I think I can do this-in Hawaii! Steph and I might even have to stay for a couple days longer after Presbytery. Sometimes you just have to make sacrifices in ministry!

For those of you prayed for me this weekend, I really am grateful. I’m struggling not to feel as though I have let you down, but I still know that you care about me and my family deeply. Thank you for your encouragement and support during all of this. We’ll do it again in a few months!!

A Little Nervous in San Francisco

2006-02-05T23:37:00.000-05:00

I'm a little more than 12 hours away from taking my oral ordination exam. At 1pm tomorrow I will sit with 6-8 other men who can ask me anything they want about the Bible, theology, the sacraments, Church History, and the Book of Church Order. I'm a little nervous. I don't think it is so much because I do not know my stuff; I think it is because this is a huge deal. If I do well on this exam, then I am only one step away from being an ordained minister of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I often wonder what I've gotten myself into.

Lovin' Life in San Francisco

2006-02-04T18:37:00.000-05:00

I'm sitting in my hotel room in downtown San Francisco, and I feel like an awfully small fish in an awfully big pond. I lived in St. Louis for six years, and I never felt like this. This seems like a whole new world to me. It's pretty sweet, though, to be able to explore a cool city like San Francisco for a couple of days. I will not have a lot of free time, but hopefully I will be able to see some of the city. I am going to City Church in the morning. This will be good. I listened to a sermon by Fred Harrell (the pastor) on the plane. He has a huge heart for the lost, and the Lord is doing good things through his church. I am looking forward to seeing how they do things on Sunday mornings. I would imagine it will give me some good things to think about for Jordan Pres. The hardest part of this trip will be eating on my own. I went to the doctor last week, and I found out that I need to seriously cut down on the cholesterol. The problem is that I have lived off hamburgers and fries for 30 years. Now I'm eating Trail Mix for lunch, and will probably eat a salad for dinner. Oh well, at least I'm eating a salad in San Francisco. It can't that bad!

I'm It

2006-01-29T21:17:00.000-05:00

I just recently got tagged by my good friend shookfoil so I guess I need to respond:

4 jobs I've had
-Counseling Intern
-Bank of America
-Creve Couer Golf Course
-TGI Friday's (back when you had to wear "The Flair"

4 movies I could watch over and over again
-The Matrix
-Tommy Boy
-Lord of the Rings
-Shawshank Redemption

4 books I could read over and over
-Lord of the Rings
-Narnia
-The Bruised Reed
-Spiritual Depression

4 places I've lived
-Augusta GA
-Lookout Mtn. GA
-St. Louis MO
-Jordan UT (beginning in April)

4 tv shows I watch
-Seinfeld
-Cosby Show
-Law & Order (Criminal Intent is the best)
-24 (if I had time to schedule my life around a tv show)

4 places I have been on vacation
-Banner Elk NC
-DeBordieu SC
-West Palm Beach FL
-Estes Park CO

4 websites I visit daily
-MSNBC
-MSNBC Sports
-Young Levites (see sidebar)
-My pastor from St. Louis

4 favorite foods
-meat and potatoes
-meat and potatoes
-meat and potatoes
-meat and potatoes

4 places I'd like to be right now
-Jordan UT
-Colorado Springs CO
-St. Louis MO
-The Melting Pot (lots of meat and potatoes there)

4 friends I'm tagging
-all my friends have already been tagged

Boring Christianity

2006-01-27T09:33:00.000-05:00

In C.S. Lewis' The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, the crew reach a blackness on the water, and they are having a hard time deciding whether or not to take the ship into it because they do not know what lies ahead. They are about to turn around and go back when Reepicheep the mouse says, "Will someone explain to me [why we are not going in?] If I were addressing peasants or slaves," he said, "I might suppose that this suggestion proceeded from cowardice. But I hope it will never be told in Narnia that a company of noble and royal persons in the flower of their age turned tail because they weere afraid of the dark."
"But what manner of use would it be plowing through the darkness?" asked Drinian. (the ship's captain)
"Use?" replied Reepicheep. "Use, Captain? If by use you mean filling our bellies or our purses, I confess it will be no use at all. So far as I know we did not set sail to look for things useful but to seek honor and adventure. And here is as great an adventure as ever I heard of, and here, if we turn back, no little impeachment of all our honors."
I love Christ's church. I long to serve her, but we as Christians have got to stop being so boring. Living as a Christian is not limited to "a better family life" or "better relationships" or even "an eternal home." If this is all there is to being a Christian, then what is the difference between Christianity and Mormonism? Mormonism offers the exact same things.
Living life as a Christian means we are willing to take risks even when we are surrounded by complete darkness. We are not "peasants and slaves," but sons and daughters who do not follow a safe Lion, but a good one. Jesus is worthing taking risks for. He is worth stepping out on faith for even if you do not know where you are going or what is going to happen. The world sees us as "nice, moral people who are sometimes wacky, but otherwise okay." God does not call us to be nice. He calls us to follow him with everything we are. He is worth it.

Sex and Prayer

2006-01-25T11:27:00.000-05:00

In Five Smooth Stones for Pastoral Work, Eugene Peterson writes, "Much of pastoral work has to do with nurturing intimacy, that is, developing relationships in which love is successfully expressed and received-shared...All horizontal relationships between other persons, when they achieve any degree of intimacy at all, are aspects of sexuality. All vertical relationships with persons of the Godhead, when there is any degree of intimacy at all involve prayer. And since there are never instances of merely horizontal relationships and never any solely vertical relationships-we are created in both directions; there are not one-dimensional beings-both sexuality and prayer can be used to explore and develop personal relationships of intimacy. Either, used thus, involves the other. When we develop and express our love to another person we are using the same words and actions and emotions that also are used to develop and express our love for God; and vice versa." This is a great thought, but one that makes me a little uncomfortable. It reveals both my little love for people and for God himself. It is one of those areas in my life where God has done great work already, but there is still a ways to go.

The Blessing and Pain of Children

2006-01-23T13:42:00.000-05:00

My daughter turns one today. My son turned three last week. My life continues to flash before my very eyes. How does life go by so fast? I can remember every second of when Joshua was born. It seems like it just happened last week. It has been the fastest three years of my life. I cannot even remember what my little girl was like as a tiny baby. She is losing most of her baby features and turning more and more into a little girl. They are supposed to be upstairs taking a nap right now, but instead they are making each other laugh. This is definitely one of the blessings of having children. They make me laugh all the time. They are such a joy to everyone around them. Being a parent brings both blessing and pain. There is nothing like getting an uninstigated hug and kiss from my son. There is also nothing like wondering what is the best plan of action when he does not obey. It makes it even more difficult as we are living with my in-laws right now, so he is in a completely different environment. We are praying for patience and wisdom as we struggle to teach both of our children the importance of obedience. It is not that we are slave masters who need our egos fed by telling what our children what to do. It is the fact that we are their parents, and we know what is best for them. We want them to know that we are good and that they can trust us. We long for them to see how God deals with them in the way we deal with them: with grace, wisdom, and compassion. I am convinced that discipline is a part of this, but discipline with a purpose.

Preparation for Ordination

2006-01-18T18:56:00.000-05:00

I am in the process of becoming an ordained minister in the Presbyterian Church in America. Part of what this means is that tomorrow morning I will have six hours to take a written exam prepared by the Candidates & Credentials Committe of the Northern California Presbytery. My wife says it is equivalent to taking the Bar exam or the Board Exam for Med. school. They can ask me anything they want in the areas of Bible, Theology, Church History, Sacraments, and the Book of Church Order. I have been studying pretty hard the last few weeks, but I could probably stand a little bit more. The problem is that I have to have everything turned it by 5pm this Friday. I think I will do okay. I'm going back and forth with feeling I need to really impress the guys on the committee, and not really caring what they think. Today is the first time I have found somewhat of a balance, and it feels like an axious adrenaline rush. I jumped off an 80 feet tall cliff into the Tennessee River when I was a freshman in college, and it feels a little like that. I should probably be studying right now instead of blogging. This is only my third time, and I think I'm already addicted.

No Time for Loosers

2006-01-17T21:43:00.000-05:00

I'm behind and to the left of the guy holding the trophy. The reason I'm smiling is because I managed to make it through two softball seasons without pulling my hamstring. If we had played one more second, I would have.

First Blog Baby!

2006-01-17T21:11:00.000-05:00

I’m finally giving in. I have joined everyone else I know, and started my own blog page. And now that I’ve done it I have nothing to say. I think I put too much pressure on my self to try and write something cool. Why bother? How many people will actually read this? Anyway, I mainly started a blog so that friends and family could check out what is happening in Jordan, Utah as we minister to Mormons. We do not move out there until April, but that will be here before we know it. I am dying to get out there and begin the ministry to which the Lord has called me and my family. I spent six years in seminary (no that is not a type-o, I said six years) and the Lord has prepared all of us for this. Some people think we are crazy for going to such a spiritually dead place, but I am absolutely convinced that Utah is not beyond the grace of God. I am very excited to join in on what the Lord is already doing, and cannot wait to see what he will continue to do.